The Marriage Mania of Pride and Prejudice

          In Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, it is starkly evident that, on the whole, the novel’s female characters are entirely possessed by the idea of marriage. From Mrs. Bennett, who shamelessly plays matchmaker for her five daughters, to Lydia and Kitty, who relentlessly chase any man who strikes their fancy, to the family’s gossiping neighbors, “proper” marriage appears to be the hinge on which the rest of society swings. The very first line, in fact, substantiates this theme: “It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife” (1). Although Austen uses verbal irony in this statement and thus subtly mocks this aspect of her society, the truth remains that for women of that time period and social status, a good marriage was crucial for their future economic and social security. Furthermore, marriage seems to be the only available avenue for women who wish to find purpose or make any notable contribution to society. As much as the characters discuss “accomplished [young] women,” as Bingley does on page 32, the ironically named “accomplishments” include frivolous and mundane activities such as “paint[ing] tables, cover[ing] screens, and net[ting] purses,” none of which demonstrate any special aptitude on the part of women (32). Instead, a woman may only gain real and lasting recognition as a result of a marriage to a respectable man (ideally to one high above her own station) for the joint benefit of herself and her family. It would seem then, that with marriage being so critical to a woman’s reputation and survival, love and compatibility ought to be secondary concerns at most, with necessity and practicality instead topping the list. Yet through the example of Elizabeth’s gradually growing respect and affection for Mr. Darcy, Jane Austen presents what, in her mind, is the ideal option: marriage founded on both love and reasonableness. In the novel as a whole, however, this idea extends beyond the topic of marriage, but is rather one small part of the story’s greater meaning: the reconciliation of emotional desires and logical reality.

Although marriage is the most obvious reflection of this overarching theme, the “ideal reader” must recognize that it is merely a reflection and that the quest for balance deeply affects the lives of the individual characters as well as the greater society of Pride and Prejudice. In Elizabeth, for example, this conflict manifests itself in her fiercely independent attitude, which she often uses as a defense mechanism to cover up her real emotions. Whether this means feigning nonchalance after secretly hearing Darcy insult her appearance at a ball or pushing aside feelings of familial responsibility in order to refuse a proposal from Mr. Collins, the “ideal reader” must recognize that Elizabeth deals with the emotion/sense struggle on a personal level, not just a romantic one. Furthermore, the society of Hertfordshire as a group also faces this dilemma: the question of whether to follow their own desires and thus find personal happiness or to obey the unwritten rules of higher society in hopes of tangible success is an ever-present conflict. Therefore, the “ideal reader” recognizes that marriage is one small, if clear, facet of a greater theme. On a more literal note, however, the “ideal reader” must acknowledge the fact that Austen’s presentation of marriage, while wonderful and pleasant to contemplate, is highly optimistic and ought to be seen as the exception, rather than the rule. To believe that any given woman could actually find a Mr. Darcy—a fabulously wealthy, yet also endearingly shy, eloquent, devoted, sweetheart-once-you-get-to-know-him type of man—outside of the pages of a novel is improbable. The “ideal reader” ought to realize this and appreciate the entertainment value of the work in addition to its deeper themes—just like the characters who struggle for balance between emotion and practicality, the “ideal reader” must find a balance between appreciating the novel for its simple pleasantness and its analytical merit.

To return to the more specific theme of marriage, in relation to my own life, and speaking from my 21^st century female perspective, I find myself somewhat repelled Austen’s portrayal of marriage and women. While I adore the idea of an Austen-esque romance, it bothers me that women seem to serve very little purpose outside of their marriages. To me, it is almost as if the story ends too soon—Elizabeth relies on her own feelings, intelligence, wit, and great personal strength, eventually learns to sacrifice her prejudices when she is proven wrong, finally agrees to marry Darcy, and!...it ends there. It is as if her entire life were a slow build toward her wedding day and, as wonderful as her love story is, I cannot  see myself finding happiness or fulfillment in a similar situation. In my own life, I do not see marriage as an end goal, but rather as a single, if highly significant, step in life. Even as a little girl, I did not spend the typical inordinate amounts of time planning my wedding or playing house—instead, I read books and taught myself how to ride two-wheelers. Even now, I do not seek to define my life and personality through boys or thoughts of marriage, but rather through my faith, accomplishments, and experiences. In my personal opinion, marriage ought to come in the middle of the story, instead of the final chapter where Jane Austen places it.